One call a week.
Every week.

You already know your brothers. You’ve read their Battle Plans and Visions, you see their numbers every week, and you hear them on the team call. The Battle Brother call takes all of that deeper.

For a month, you and one brother talk every week, one on one, and what you know about each other goes from the headline to the story behind it. It can be five minutes or an hour. What matters is that it happens.

A team call gives every man a few minutes. A post gives him a few paragraphs. That’s enough to know what a brother is working on. It isn’t enough room for why it matters to him, what it’s costing him, or what he’s carrying alongside it.

One on one, there’s room. You know his number dipped in a quadrant; on the call you hear what that week was like. You know what’s in his Vision; on the call you hear why it’s in there. You know his wife’s name; on the call you hear how the two of them are doing.

That depth pays off everywhere else. When he posts a rough week, you know what’s behind it. When he pushes you on a hot seat, you know he understands your situation. The deeper you know a man, the more useful you can be to him.

Plenty of men also go a long time without anyone asking how they’re doing and then waiting for the answer. On this team, every man gets that every week.

Pairings rotate every month. Each week, one of you is the Battle Brother Captain (BBC), and the role alternates week to week. The BBC owns getting that week’s call scheduled, so there’s never a question of whose move it is.

Scheduling runs through battlebrothercalls.com. Set your calendar availability there and keep it current. The site shows who’s paired with who and who the BBC is each week. When it’s your week, get a time on the calendar early. The earlier it’s set, the more likely it happens.

On top of the scheduled call, either man can text “Got 5 minutes?” any time.

The BBC gets a call on the calendar. The text catches everything the calendar can’t: the drive home, the school pickup line, ten minutes between meetings. When you hit a gap, text your Battle Brother: “Got 5 minutes?”

Either man can send it, BBC or not, any time, as often as he likes. The man who gets it has three answers:

1. Answer 01“Yes.”You call him right then.
2. Answer 02“Give me 15.”Or 30, or “after 4.” He calls when he’s clear.
3. Answer 03Nothing.Silence means “not right now” and nothing more.

The third answer is what makes it work. Because he’s free to ignore it, you’re free to send it. You never have to wonder whether it’s a good time, because finding that out is the whole point of the text. Send it Tuesday, again Wednesday, twice on Thursday. That isn’t nagging; it’s two busy men hunting for the same gap. Even the ones that go unanswered tell him a brother was thinking about him today.

A few things keep it working:

• Keep the wording the same. When “Got 5 minutes?” lands on his phone, he knows exactly what it is and what his options are.
• Respect the five. If you asked for five, start wrapping at five. If it’s going somewhere, ask, “You good to keep going?” Guys say yes to the next text when the last one cost what it said it would.
• Either man sends. The BBC owns the calendar; nobody owns the text. If you’ve let a couple go by, send the next one yourself when you come up for air.
• Know his clock. Your drive home might be his first coffee in Australia or his bedtime in Britain. Work out the hours you’re both awake and aim your texts there. A text that lands at 3 a.m. isn’t a problem, because silence is a fine answer, but the ones that land in his gaps are the ones that turn into calls.
• Send it wherever you two already talk. For brothers overseas that’s probably WhatsApp, and the call can happen there too.
• Use the scheduled call as the backstop. If the texts keep missing, that’s what the BBC and the site are for.
• If you need him, say so. “Got 5 minutes?” is a no-pressure ask. When something is urgent, text “Need 5” or just call. When a brother sends you that, find the five minutes.

If the text is “Got 5 minutes?”, the call is one question:

“Just tell me what you’re carrying.”

Every man is carrying something: a deadline, a decision, a sick parent, a kid he’s worried about, an opportunity he doesn’t want to blow. It doesn’t have to be bad. It’s whatever has weight for him this week. You already know his goals and his numbers. This is what’s sitting underneath them.

The “just” matters. Five minutes isn’t enough to fix anything, so don’t try. Your job is to hear it. A man who says it out loud to a brother who’s listening usually walks away carrying it a little easier, and you walk away knowing where his head is this week.

1. 01Ask it, and listen.
2. 02If there’s time, one follow-up: “What’s the heaviest part?”
3. 03Swap. He asks you.
4. 04Close with “I’ll ask you about that next time.” Then do it.

If he says “not much this week,” take him at his word and tell him what you’re carrying. Going first does more than pushing.

Next time, start from there: “Last time you were carrying ___. Heavier or lighter?” That’s how a string of five-minute calls ends up deeper than any one of them.

Once you’re on the phone, there’s no required format. It might be:

• A check-in. How’s your week, how are you taking care of yourself, what’s coming up.
• A follow-up. He said something on the team call or in the chat that stuck with you, so you ask him about it.
• A sounding board. One of you is chewing on a decision and wants to think out loud.
• A heads-up. “I’ve got a hard conversation at 2:00. Ask me tonight how it went.”
• A win. Something went right and you want to tell someone who’ll get why it matters.
• A walk-and-talk. From the truck, on a walk, in the garage. You don’t need a desk.

A loose shape for a scheduled call. Take what helps and leave the rest.

1. 01Catch up.How the week went, plus whatever thread was left hanging last time.
2. 02Go one layer down.“What are you carrying?” works here too, with time for the follow-ups. Or start from something you already know about him and ask what’s behind it. Before you offer advice, try: “Do you want ideas, or do you just need to say it out loud?”
3. 03Swap.Both men get the floor.
4. 04Close.“What’s coming up that I should ask you about next time?”

If the conversation goes somewhere good, follow it. The outline is for the weeks you’re not sure what to talk about.

Not for every call. Most of them start from something you already know and go one level down.

• Start from what you already know. Before your first call of the month, reread his Battle Plan and Vision. Open with something from them, and you’re picking up where the team’s knowledge of him leaves off.
• Go first. The man who opens up first sets the depth for the call. If you want more than small talk, offer more than small talk.
• Write one line after each call. Note what he was carrying and what’s coming up for him. Opening the next call with “How did your daughter’s recital go?” tells him you were listening, and few things build trust faster.
• Let him help you. Bring something you’re stuck on. Helping Others is in the credo, and asking for his take gives him the chance to live it.
• Do something together. Same book chapter, same workout challenge, same cold-shower streak for the month. It gives the calls a running thread and a little friendly competition.
• Close the month well. On the last call, tell him one specific thing you saw in him this month and one thing you’re taking from him. It’s something most men rarely hear from another man.
• Keep the thread alive. When the pairing rotates, the connection doesn’t have to. A text a month later asking how that thing turned out takes thirty seconds. Give it a year and there are a dozen brothers you know at that depth, and who know you the same way.